Relationship Gut Check

Twin Flames. Soul Mates. Best Friends.AppleOrchard2017(70of84)

Whatever you call it, you’ve found your person.  Save the cutesy “they complete me stuff.” The right person doesn’t complete you – they accept you completely. Ever experienced the wrong relationship that you thought was right at one point?  You think they’re just right for you, but your gut knows its not.  Maybe its a harmful relationship.  Abusive, mentally, emotionally, or perhaps even physically.  And somehow you feel so attracted to and stuck with that person.  I want you to know right now that you are NEVER stuck with the wrong person, no matter how hopeless it seems. Trust. Your. Gut.

Trust your gut.  It knows what you need better than you do.

Once you’ve been through the wrong ones, its time to be open and ready for the “right” one.  Being open to the experience sounds ridiculous, but its the key.  If you’re closed off to the possibility that your other half will walk into your life, it simply won’t happen.  That means not making snap judgments about the people who come into your life.  That means not ruling out people because they didn’t immediately appeal to you.  That means being open minded to people you previously would have instantly “friend zoned.” That doesn’t mean everyone gets an opportunity to take a shot at you.  It does mean you stop making yourself crazy worrying about who might be right for you and just let it happen.

You’ll know you found them when…

Your heart feels at home with them.  It literally doesn’t matter where you roam; when you’re together, you feel at home.  You understand each other on a level deeper than you’ve ever imagined. You connect – you don’t necessarily always agree – but you are on the same wavelength.  Maybe your attraction began with your eyes.  You might have been initially attracted to their looks but now their physical beauty is secondary to the attraction to who they are.

In the past, your ability to empathize and feel others’ emotions might have caused you trouble.  Perhaps it ended up trapping you in a toxic relationship or caused you to become entirely overwhelmed.  Now, you’ll find that you can sense and adapt to your partner’s emotions with sensitivity and they can in return. You’d do anything to ensure their happiness, except for sacrificing your own – you don’t have to do that with the right person.

You’ve got goals in life, and so do they.  And you each challenge and encourage each other to reach for them.  None of this placating apathy.  You push each other to achieve your goals and work together to get there.

AppleOrchard2017(75of84)I’m getting teary just thinking of all this.  If you’ve ever looked at relationships before and thought “that’s a fairy tale” or “I bet its totally different behind closed doors” (we’ve watched too many Lifetime movies, amiright), you haven’t found the right person yet.  I’ve been there.  I’ve sacrificed everything but living and breathing for the wrong person.  When I came to my senses, it took my whole being to get out.  I got lucky.  I came to my senses.  I got out, via hell and high water. And then I found someone who my heart and soul is at peace and at home with.  All in less than a year.  You need it, you deserve it.  Be open to it.

 

Happy 6 months, love!

-Jess

Photos by Kristin With An I Photography

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